Swing Me

It is never too late to be introduced to something new. Just when I thought my life couldn't get any more messed up, I was approached in a way that was new, even to me. Here I was, limping into the bar with a cast on, and before I knew it, I was confronted with a proposition to have sex with someone's wife.

Do you know how strange it is to have a woman hit on you with her husband standing 2 feet away? I mean, I am pretty cool under pressure, but still, that is an awkward moment for anybody. Apparently, he likes to watch other men have sex with his wife. Okay, yeah, I have heard of such fetishes, but to involve me? I am not used to that kind of thing. I am a simple man with simple desires.

To complicate matters further, there was another girl involved. Her name was Sarah and is a friend of a friend. I had never met her before but she knew a little bit about these swingers that seemed interested in me. You see, I was in denial at first. I thought the woman was just a little drunk and a little flirty, but they informed me that they are swingers. Well, in an attempt to avoid the swingers, apparently I made too good of an impression on Sarah. Honestly, I wasn't trying to flirt or pick up either women. My natural demeanor is friendly and can sometimes give the wrong impression.

So, in my attempt to avoid having sex with someone else's wife, I inadvertently made another girl feel wanted. Really, I had no idea what was going on. I had taken pain pills and then foolishly went out to the bar. By then end of the night, I had a woman asking me to sleep with her and letting her husband watch, and another girl who thought I was repulsed by that proposition and wanted me to go home with her.

If I was a scumbag, I would have got the single girl's number and then gone home with the wife. But because I am still so mentally effed up, I said no to the swingers and told the single girl that I would call her.

I have no plans to speak to either of them ever again.

Is it really so difficult to just find a single girl who likes me for me? My god, I always find the most messed up chicks.

Go figure.

All I know is that I refuse to ever get involved with someone who is already in a relationship. I tried that once and got burned beyond belief. From now on, I will just exploit young, inexperienced girls. That way I don't get hurt so bad.